sunburst_strength

From the weekend through today, I've done pretty well despite feeling crapish. I worked out on the Active Friday, Sunday and Monday. Saturday was a rest day on there, but I did a significant amount of walking, some of it scurrying to keep up with a skinny guy while hanging up posters for chorus. Today is a rest day also, and I'm actually going to take it as such.

I was proud of myself for working out last night after I had chorus rehearsal (which I don't normally have on Monday, but we needed to rehearse with the men) even though I was tired. The thing that sucked was that the program has a low tolerance for shaking, and I wasn't too steady on some of the strength training exercises. Which led to me getting frustrated and calling the virtual trainer a cunt and flipping off my TV. :\

I've been making healthy food choices for the most part. I'm not pushing too hard on that while I don't feel well. I did go and get some batteries for my scale so I could weight myself. It was about what I expected, so there's not much I can say about that. I don't intend to check it again for another few weeks, until I finish my 30-day challenge. It's more important that I *feel* better.

I did well most of the day today. Worked out briefly in the morning, the usual weekday breakfast of yogurt and low-sugar oatmeal. I had a Healthy Choice frozen meal for lunch and as a treat had a two-pack of Oreo peanut butter cakesters. I came home from work, ate a snack of a small bowl of whole grain cereal with soy milk, and then did Day 2 of the Sports Active 30 day challenge.

The workout kicked my butt, lots of pounding on my feet, and then I had to run off to chorus practice. Of course, practice turned out to be two hours of being on my feet 3/4 of the time or more. WOE. I also started to feel kind of funky, probably low blood sugar from dinner being delayed on top of working out and all that standing. I'm so damn glad to be home and fed, and I'm clearly going to have to make chorus days rest days.

I made tilapia microwaved with seasoning and a smidge of butter with lots of broccoli and snow peas, and I also drank one of those wee single-serving bottles of White Zinfandel. I'm still kind of hungry, sadly, and REALLY ish I had some fruit on hand. I need to do better about keeping healthy snacks around, and in the absence of something better I'm probably going to have a small handful of sour patch kids. Oh well.

Okay, I've failed at posting here. I've been mired in an attack of the blahs, but I'm trying to get out of it. I have exercised in small amounts off and on and been sometimes okay and sometimes rather not okay about eating healthy.

Today I decided to start the 30 day challenge on EA Sports Active. I only did 15 minutes, but it was not easy! I had to skip a few lower-body exercises because the leg strap thing is just not working for me. It was too small, and I got some extra velcro so that it fits, but it won't stay on. I guess my thighs are just too tapered and soft, but I have a plan. The walk/run works okay with the nunchuck in my pocket, but the squats and lunges just didn't register. So I'm going to take a snug pair of capris and sew a small pocket on the front of the right thigh to hold the nunchuck. Then I can just wear those pants when I use the Sports Active--good enough.

The sections I did were walking/running (in place), inline skating, and some various arm-strengthening exercises with the resistance band. Oh, and boxing! I'm really kind of loving boxing on the Wii. I'm planning to do some Just Dance tonight after dinner settles. ;)

ETA: I got my nunchuck pocket (made out of most of the foot part of an orphan sock) sewn on and did a short custom workout on Sports Active to test it out. Looks goofy: check. Works: check. Needs to be sewn on better: Double check.

I have a lot of issues/problems with trying to get fit, eat healthier, lose weight, etc. I totally believe in health at any size and in the beauty of people of size, so it often feels like a kind of betrayal of that to work on losing weight. OTOH, my goal is NOT to be thin, just to be more of a smaller/moderate plus-size rather than barely still fitting in plus-size. And I'd like to have the energy to do more things in general.

Another problem I tend to run into is that I'm Little Miss Muffet. I'm either working on this thing full-on and thinking of little else and being nearly perfect or I'm eating whatever the fuck I want and never purposely exercising. I need to find a balance, a middle ground. I need to find a way to make this work that's sustainable so I don't burn out. I usually go to walking for exercise, but between cold, rain and our sticky hot summers I have excuses more days than not. I do live in a great neighborhood for walking, so I do plan to keep it as an option--I just need other options.

I don't really have room for exercise equipment, and I definitely don't have the money for the kind of equipment that would accommodate my weight without crapping out. So I bought a Wii, my first video game system ever. I don't have a Wii fit, partially because the boards are scarce and partially because I've heard that the game itself scolds you for tiny weight fluctuations. I got the EA Sports Active, and Just Dance, plus of course the sports games. I'm keeping an eye on craigslist to get the Wii Fit board without the game.

I know what I need to do food-wise. What I like to do is focus on whole grains, veggies, fruits and beans with low-fat dairy and eggs because I do like those things and they fill me up and make me feel good in the long-term. Of course, what I *want* a lot of the time is pizza and ice cream and fried tofu, so I need to have those sometimes, too. I'm vegetarian, but I've been experimenting with adding fish/seafood back into my diet. That's as far as I would go--the thought of eating poultry or red meat is *bad*. Plus, there are good substitutes for those things, but fish and seafood can't be copied well.

So, I'm trying. Again. And I'm not expecting myself to be perfect.